Merging w/ Shadow Self

MERGING WITH SHADOW SELF

Facing the deepest dark depths of our being,  I solidify the practice of exposing my inner most self.
     Shaking in concentration, I reject the energies that threaten my control and sanity. 

 I expel these energies with all intent of connecting with my Divine source, hoping to clear the channels of communication. 

 Demons of my past surface to haunt and remind me of an upbringing that indirectly, or better, directly inflicted fear in my being. 
Why am I so afraid, right now? 

 Was the fear meant to purify ones intent and vessel.

  Shuttering and shivering pushing with all my might, I am stronger than my fears.  

Ahhh but i am breaking, exasperated through the use of all will.  I reach a plateau of relief. 

 Is it gone? 

 Is it really really gone? 

 Each session engaged to continue my purification, I wonder if I am the same old demon that I seek to conquer.  

Who am I really in battle within ? 

 Self? 

How ironic.... awkwarddd. 

  What's on the other side? 

 Sweet nectars of victory,  juicing and oozing, gulp, I must drink it in.  

As time progresses, I wonder if the battle will get any easier.  

Crossing between realms, turbulence with every passing. 

 Safe flight and landing is eventually promised, and achieved through sweat and tears.

Sometimes in losing my strength, I catch the aromas of confusion.  But I persist with my head down, in pure receiving of something greater than me. 

 Subservient to the Divine Creator, I insist with polite undertones, and ask to receive.  Cleansing Utopian electric like energy courses my body, and I am liberated, from my own self imposed limitations.

Wash me over with the Holy Water.  

Allow me to revere in your glory.  

Soaking every last bit, loyalty is anchored everlasting.

Here I Am.

For You Heavenly.

Allow Me To Serve You.

AMEN

J.ACK

-JANIECE GABRIEL